Thursday, July 10, 2014

She believed she could so she did*

Once upon a time there was a girl named Joni.
That's me.
Welcome to my blog.

Joni (will refer to myself in the 3rd person for this story because I happen to think it sounds better)

So, Joni decided one day after looking at the box that the Fed Ex man dropped off and started to get twitchy.
You see, last week Joni ordered a fantastic new fan online (since the other fan is possessed by Nicholas Cage who Joni is not a fan of at all in any way shape or form. Bad fan=Nicholas Cage.  And you questioned how witty I was. Sheesh)

She asked for help putting it together but just couldn't be patient long enough for that to happen.
Joni talks a lot about her impatience.
She should probably start working on that ugly character flaw.
Anyways, so Joni spied that Fed Ex box sitting in the corner and knew that the day just happened to be jam-pack-less (that means you get to stay in your jammies until 3 pm, take your shower shortly thereafter and then put on your deodorant if you feel like being nice)

So, she believes that directions are relatively easy for her to follow.
For goodness sakes she is Joe Taylor's daughter.
She owns her own Leatherman.
Installed a new sink faucet.
Fixes toilets.
Installs sprinkler systems.
Joni likes tools and directions, she also happens to like rules, lists, and order.
(see how it sounds better in the 3rd person? otherwise i just sound like a bragger)

So, she did what Joni does.
Opened the box and tried.
Here is the before fan.
Here are the pieces of the new fan.
(Lists and order.  You have to check to make sure the parts are there BEFORE you start. 
That's installation 101.)
Joni just so happens to be afraid of heights.
It's what we like to call short people problems.
That's about as high as she goes.
Amazingly, Joni detached the fan all the way to this point at which she realized that her short people problems were entirely too traumatic to go up another rung on the ladder.
She believed she could, so she did*


*call her dad that is.

This is Joe.
Joni's dad.
He just finished building Joni and Steve a retaining wall.
That's why Joni didn't want to bug her dad.
She kinda already owes him big time.
Sometimes she pretends that she knows more than she does about electronics.
Joni is convinced however, that if the fan could have been mounted on the floor 
she'd have done just dandy.

So basically Daddy Joe came to the rescue, again.
There may or may not have been a fretful moment where they thought the wires didn't work or the fan was faulty because Joni never stuck the 9v remote battery to her tongue to test before installing.  That may or may not have resulted in an hour or so of tests and rewiring.
Joni will never tell.
So the new fan is beautiful.
Gorgeous in fact.
Works like a champ.
Super good looking.
It's name is Matthew McConaughey.
Big fan.

In fact is cooled off Lloyd Mountain so much so that a little boy named Zachary got cold and turned the AC to HEATER and cranked it to 90.
The house stunk quite a bit and Joni actually thought her computer was 
burning up until the little chilly-pants confessed.

Joni has resigned herself to not tackling electrical system required things for a while.
But... stay tuned, she may just install an outside faucet for which she will be super proud.

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